Home
matthew's Journal

> recent entries
> calendar
> friends
> profile
> previous 20 entries

Advertisement

Thursday, October 21st, 2004
9:51 am
 




JOYCE JILSON HOROSCOPE

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23)
Tricky situations are your specialty. There's nothing you can't figure out, and you love the challenge. In relationships, be the one to put things to the next level. Partners may lag behind unless you push them onward and upward.

(comment on this)

Sunday, October 10th, 2004
1:14 am - boom boom, boom kachuoom!
i need to find someone who loves me as much as i love myself.
until that happens i will not be happy.

(2 comments | comment on this)

Tuesday, September 28th, 2004
7:32 pm - empty pit
question. how would you feel if your girlfriend didn't call you and then went to the movies with her ex-boyfriend?

i feels like the shit.

(comment on this)

Sunday, September 26th, 2004
4:27 pm - time
-happy birthday to me.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Monday, September 13th, 2004
9:45 pm - drunk
i fucked a new person tonight, she was young, too young.

i need different hobbies.

(3 comments | comment on this)

Sunday, August 29th, 2004
12:50 am - endless pain
bam boom
yep it feels like that.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Friday, August 27th, 2004
3:14 am - what to do
heal-be happy
love-be happy
limbo-be unhappy
tonight was a good night, my first in a while. i really can't explain how i am feeling, it is something between liberation and serious longing.
i judge people who are indecisive to quickly.

(comment on this)

Tuesday, August 17th, 2004
2:04 am - fuck all you
i never update so i thought i would.
just because i am drunk.
i am also very unhappy,

(comment on this)

Friday, January 30th, 2004
12:09 am - new phone
i have a new phone numberit is 971-6281. i expect many calls.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Monday, January 26th, 2004
2:23 am - those colors
not today...maybe tomorrrow.

have you all met hans?

(comment on this)

Tuesday, January 6th, 2004
10:34 pm - wow and the reasons why i wow
it comes
it flows
all I bottled is released
and the bottle itself is emptied
my heart
my spirit
my soul and the bottle are one.

(comment on this)

Monday, January 5th, 2004
6:02 am - dog hair sofa
living here is very much like being forced to hold your breath while someone you don't like talks AT you three inches from your face.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Sunday, December 28th, 2003
11:38 pm - relocation
i am living at ryans now.
sorry to those i have hurt.
don't worry i will get whats coming to me.
i still have dues to pay.

(2 comments | comment on this)

Sunday, November 9th, 2003
1:33 am - i miss love
so these revelations are cool, tonight i miss love,
i think that i miss alot of things,
i miss being drunk, i miss knowing what would make me happy.

i miss morgan,
and ashley,
and ashleigh,
and eyrn,
and rachels,
and nameless others,

i miss myself,
myself a year ago,
myself six months ago,
myself last week,
i don't know who i am anymore,
next year i will have spent one forth of my life in tucson,

i miss writting poems, leaving them on cars or sending them in letters.

i miss the joy of a warm body next to me as i wake up.

i miss missing the nights without that body.

love saves us,

you can't fight your way out of love.

i don't have those feelings anymore,

i don't think i can love,

at least for now.

but i need to,
i need to love so much.

i found out alot tonight,
mustly i just realized i am broken,
because i miss love.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Tuesday, November 4th, 2003
3:21 am - fear
things i am afraid of. poor spelling, being dumb, girls, women, relationships,bees, really big fires, ryan cock, my own cock, girls in wigs, some kinds of african tree frogs with poisin skin, war, death without drugs, cancer, not having smokes, not winning at chess, losing at life, ryan in the dark, money running out, drugs running out, drugs not running out, youth and time running out on speed, being too fat, eating to much, not eating enough, becoming my father, loving anything, liking some people, girls under 18, the person i used to be, black people, white people, brown and yellows too, any one who is not me,my car breaking down, drinking alone, coke, being bad at life, ryan when he is lonely,
















can i finsh that? no question, katz in love with anal sex. katz in love wiht me, in the love with the world. SPIN IT. kiss the cat, not the hot brace face. give it to me mona! give me AIDS and give me saturday pay, negro/

(1 comment | comment on this)

Monday, October 20th, 2003
12:27 am - girls
anyone who disagrees with the fact that "Pork Helper", a new line from the wonderful makers of "Hamburger Helper", is the greatest human achievement, would have to be a fool or a liar. maybe both.

i have lived and died a thousand times in the last week.

(comment on this)

Saturday, October 18th, 2003
3:09 am - stuff
want is all that drives me.

i think i am at the point of fucking everything and bailing on this world for a couple years.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Monday, October 13th, 2003
11:02 pm - boats
i want to live on a boat,
i don't have to be by myself,
and it can be a ship,
a navy shit,
i think i will join,
but i need to fix things first,
they haven't been fixed in a while,
they have been drown in drink and drug,
i am sorry if i am not happy to see anyone for a while,
i think i burnt out all my happiness,
and now i will just be a pile of stuff,
waiting to be human again.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Saturday, September 13th, 2003
1:47 am - chakras
addiction is in the second chakra,
the chakra of love,
leaving nicotine is harder than leaving any of the women i have had,
and some of them i went back to,
three or four times,
i will fight and win.

current mood: irritated
current music: cash

(2 comments | comment on this)

Tuesday, September 9th, 2003
12:03 am - my none drink night
fucking i hate everything right now,
i want to drown out all these sober attempts with a gallon of wine just for me, but i have made my promise and i will keep it. no matter how angry or anti-social it makes me. i need to try and be a person again. the worst is i forgot how to fall sleep unless i'm stoned or drunk.

(1 comment | comment on this)


> previous 20 entries
> top of page
LiveJournal.com